How to Trust Again
Apparently, the world appears to be one big chaotic existence. After all, what would have been in Tiger Wood's mind when he did the unthinkable? He had everything in this life that an average man can only dream to acquire. Neither Sigmund Freud, nor you or I, can possibly explain why Tiger Woods cheated on his wife. Why to mention the name of golf icon only when there are thousands of others shattering the trust of their partners. Nothing in a relationship is more frustrating than breaking of trust. I mean forget the sexual liaison, it is always in any case, one of the forerunners of several trust breaking causes but the rupture of trust that follows after the damage of emotional bonding in a relationship is something that is tough to be healed. By the way, several statistics have proved that sexual dissatisfaction is not the main cause of infidelity in men, so certainly, the issue is more complex than it appears to be.
Rebuilding trust in a relationship is not a cake walk. It is step by step process to learn how to trust again. Believe me it takes some substance and damn level of maturity to figure out the whole issue of mistrust in a relationship and then forgive someone. Nonetheless, not all is dark when it comes to rebuilding trust, but as stated earlier, things may never be the same and they will require consistent working upon the relationship for getting back together as before.
How to Trust Again in a Relationship
Learning to trust again is important but it is difficult to do so. It is essential to trust again because life can't be lived without faith, belief and trust. These are the driving factors of relationships. The anger, resentment and feeling of betrayal are more than enough to suck out positivity from an individual's life but the fact is you can't cheat yourself by stating the fact that you don't anymore need closer relationship with any person. It is a need, that can't be unmet. Moreover, one aspect of how to trust again is to consider the fact that not everyone in the world is same. After being divorced from a partner who cheated on you, it may not be so easy to trust any other individual, due to the negative memories in mind.
But then it seems to be illogical to predict every person's nature, based on one previous bad experience. So the mantra is, forgive first. I know it is easier said than done but is there a way out other than this? Living up with all the negative energy that has been given by a deed of other person. Is it worth?? Is that the way you want to live life? I hope not. To quote Lewis B. Smedes, the author of the phenomenal book, Forgive & Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don't Deserve, "When we forgive evil we do not excuse it, we do not tolerate it, we do not smother it. We look the evil full in the face, call it what it is, let its horror shock and stun and enrage us, and only then do we forgive it." So, accept it, the very solution of the problem is to face all the emotional upheaval and once for all eliminate the negative energy from yourself. This is a concrete relationship advice that must be followed, without fail. Next step is to decide if you really want to invest time in trusting him or her again. I mean really, do you want to go back to the person. Yes, love and only love must be your criteria. But this time, it must not be blind. It never is, in fact. If your answer is yes, then the only step to proceed further to solve trust issues in a relationship is to COMMUNICATE.
This is something that many couples don't do, after any emotional shock they have faced. It ends as if it was destined to end. No, don't do that. Talk about building trust in a relationship with your partner. Explain to him or her what you don't like. If she or he broke your trust, may be it is not possible for you to come back. Fine. That is your life. Not many people even read about all this stuff after being lied to. They just call it quits. It is good to move on, if you're really not in love with the other person, after his or her tragic cheating case. But some people who wish to give chance to their partners must ensure that it is not always an obligation to learn trusting again. Forgiveness has a great spiritual value. Reconciliation is always a great option to think, especially when kids are there to be taken care of. However, it is not always the perfect solution for a relationship that has been damaged by a cheating issue.
Going through several trust building exercises for couples can help you to strengthen the relationship. I hope the above information on how to build trust must have given you some food for thought. It is appreciable to reconcile things, but remember it must never be at the cost of self respect. Most importantly, it is only you who must now decide if you really want to be in the same relationship and try to improve things.
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