Let's see what the great Architect tells us about marriage.
Why is it necessary to have a Biblical perspective about marriage? We believe that God created the world with all that is in it. "The heavens are Yours, and Yours also the earth; You founded the world and all that is in it." Psalms 89:11
What an all mighty God we have! Why should we guide our marriage according to His book? The logical answer is, we are His creation. How would it be if we bought a car but asked for the instruction manual of a washing machine? We surely need the instructions for the car not for a washing machine, that's why, we come in front of God, our creator, to receive the "instructions" about marriage which is His institution.
"Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral" Hebrews 13:4 Even if many people in the world do not follow these instructions anymore, the latter still constitute the foundation of marriage. If we want to build a house but fail to use the proper foundation, the house will not stand. The decision to build a good foundation for our marriage belongs to us. How do you want your marriage to start: with or without a solid foundation?
1. A parent will never tell or give his child something that would hurt him.
"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him." Matthew 7:9-11
Our God, who loves us more than we can love our children, knows best and for sure He wouldn't tell us something to hurt our lives. He gave His people a choice, asking them to choose, there are only two alternatives: life or death. It is your decision to have a marriage full of life and happiness or ...not.
"See, I set before you, today, life and prosperity, death and destruction" Deuteronomy 30:15
"This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live" Deuteronomy 30:19 In choosing life for our marriage we need to realize that we have to act according to God's standards.
2.What are your expectations the moment you get married?
I have heard a story once as the new groom told his father-in-law: "Now, your daughter is mine!" Being a christian, the father-in-law replied:" You might say so but remember that she's God's first of all!"
A wife of noble character, a trustworthy and graceful wife is not something easy to find! "A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones." Proverbs 12:4 "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life." Proverbs 31:10-12
Likewise, an integer man, with an admirable godly character, loving and respectful is indeed a great blessing. However, the most important expectation is to realize that you should be prepared to give, not only to receive. When your goal is to give all your best for your spouse, you will not be hurt if you don't always receive.
3.Do you expect that your spouse to fulfill all your needs?
Well, let me tell you that if it is so, a big disappointment will soon come into your life and maybe you will blame the other partner. Why are so many argues in the first month of marriage? The Bible tells us why: "I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature." Romans 7:18 Our sinful nature should be killed and whatever belongs to our earthly nature. What are the things belonging to our earthly nature and must die?
"The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God." Galatians 5:19-21
God established marriage as a tool for modeling our characters using our partner. The moment we get into one family, we aren't perfect or ideal but we do have weak points. Our weaknesses and imperfections are coming with us in the marriage! In that moment we are in God's workroom to become perfect for Heaven.
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